I reckon we could all do with being a bit kinder to ourselves. Whether consciously or unconsciously, we often forget to, or actively choose against, being kind to ourselves. How many times have you belittled yourself or called yourself out for not being good enough? How often do you go against what really benefits you e.g. eat what doesn’t agree with you, do things that don’t really work for you or push yourself too hard?

It can be subtle too. At the weekend I had a couple of projects on the go, both things I really enjoyed to do, gardening and research, yet I pushed too hard. There were times I’d have preferred to rest or chill out. Instead I pushed on and really it wasn’t the kindest thing to do. When I stopped and looked at what was going on, I realised that I was trying to ‘get things right’, to prove myself somehow, to make up for something in my business not going how I’d planned it. We can be sneaky like that in our unkindness to ourselves.

Before I share my favourite activities for self kindness, here are three mindset approaches that make a huge difference.

Make it so.

As I say so often these days, ‘choose it’. Firstly, acknowledge (without judgement) where you are being unkind to yourself and then choose to be kind to yourself instead. It really is that simple. As well as doing acts of kindness for ourselves, kindness is an energy which we can choose. Just like you can’t feel happy and sad at the same time, you can’t feel both kind and unkind towards yourself in one moment. You get to consciously choose which to be. Which will you choose?

You don’t need a reason.

You may have some resistance to ‘simply choosing’ as often we that we link good feelings to achievement. I see it as index linking our feelings of worthiness to our levels of success. Eek. That’s harsh and unnecessary. Let kindness be something you can chose without conditions. Please know you are worthy of love, including self love and self kindness no matter what is going on in your life, business, relationships or finances.

Rinse and repeat.

Little and often is my motto here. Especially, if you’re suffering from chronic hypo-kindness (yes, I just made that up, but it gets the message across about how we can have under active levels of self nurturing) make treating that a priority. I’ve found that often when we need nurturing the most, that’s when we ignore it. With intention and a consistency you can change that habit, so self care, self kindness and self live then become the norm. Make it part of your daily routine.

Activities:

Here are some simple activities and exercises that can help you tap into your own inner kindness, that feeling of loving and nurturing ourselves that we all desire more of.

Inner exercises.

There are two, quite similar, meditations that I use to help me connect with self love (and what’s kinder than loving ourselves). The first is a meditation I created a few years ago for ‘bringing love to our cells’. I always feel warm and fuzzy after experiencing it. Click here to try it for yourself.
Another lovely meditation is the ‘inner smile’ meditation that I came across more recently. That feeling of smiling into myself is just gorgeous and so loving. I enjoy Lee Holden’s version which you can try here.

Outer activities and self care.

Make a list of activities you adore doing, ones that feel really nurturing and lovely. Write that list out so you can remember them when you need a top up (it’s amazing how easy it is to forget what we enjoy when our mood is low). Enjoy choosing from that list. Popular activities include walks in nature, a long hot bath, reading an inspiring book, a chat with friends, time with animals, quiet time, social time. It’s not the activity that’s important, it’s how it makes you feel, and that changes from moment to moment.

EFT Tapping.

I couldn’t ignore my ‘go to’ tool of EFT tapping (also known as Emotional Freedom Technique). Not only can you use it to foster kind feelings for yourself, to ramp up the energy of that and to gain inspiration on ways to be kinder to yourself, but as I show in this week’s video, at the same time it can be used to clear the crazy thoughts and beliefs that led us to be unkind to ourselves in the first place. That’s why I love it so much.

Click here or on the image below to see for yourself.

This is just the start.

Being kind and loving to ourselves really is an ongoing journey and it’s a skill that we develop over time and with consistent practice. The more you consciously choose to be kind to yourself and actually schedule it into your life, the more your body will thank you and your life will reflect that.

I know it can be a challenge to do this. It’s easy to do a meditation once or twice and then forget it, or for the busyness of life to sabotage those good intentions. If you’d like to rise to the challenge of truly living in a way that is kind to you and if you’d like to let go of the unkind beliefs and patterns that sabotage that, you don’t have to do it alone.
I can help you get there, show you the easiest route, hold you accountable and help you ditch that unkindness. We can see what energy techniques will work best for you and create a plan of action that’s do-able for you. Contact me to find out more.

Thanks for reading.

Please share this post with someone who could do with a top up of self-kindness today. Thanks.